The Year of Peace
I wanted to wait to share this post until we were into the year a little bit because quite honestly I was having trouble narrowing down my intentions for the year. I love a fresh start. A new year, new week, new planner etc. And when 2022 approached, while I was excited to start fresh and some concrete goals were clear, I wasn’t entirely sure what I wanted the year to look like as a whole. So, I took my time and am sharing it today.
I realized while I have some fast paced, growth-related goals, I didn’t want the year to feel fast paced and rushed. I really did want it to feel relaxed…somehow. I wanted this year to feel peaceful. Peaceful. PEACEFUL!
PEACE! That is my word for 2022.
Once I figured that out and I wrote it down, I started to think about what brings me peace. What do I enjoy. So, for me that includes: pouring my heart into From Heaven and Hope but, at the same time not allowing it to become something that I just have to complete. I means, spending quality time with family and friends. It means finding some time to relax each day. Even work days.
And then, on the other side of that, what brings me stress? Because I’ll need to figure out how to eliminate these pieces as well. So, what brings me stress is: anxiety and fear about something happening to myself or my family, unexpected expenses, the virus and all that comes with it and the occasional deadline.
Now, HOW do we keep the peaceful list and throw away the stressful list?
Well, for me, it means writing it all down. Nailing down each piece of the puzzle and then coming up with a real strategy to achieve or get rid of each of the items on the list.
Pouring into from Heaven & Hope: I really, truly love working at this so, it doesn’t feel like work. The only stressful piece is if something doesn’t get done on time. So, in order to not allow any piece of this passion project to become another “deadline” all I really need is a schedule. Blog, social media and podcast schedule. I need to schedule all these items several weeks in advance so that there is a cushion and time to figure out what comes next. Done!
Spending quality time with family and friends: I have a great family and my little fam has spent the last 6 years trying to grow. We spent so much time, money and energy on just that, we literally haven’t done anything else. We haven’t travelled since 2015. We haven’t had a real birthday party since Kyla’s 2nd and even that was days before the initial lockdown and many were sick. It’s just meant alot of limbo but, we’ve made some decisions to change that on the family level this year. And, the main way we can do this is to again, plan ahead. Plan a trip for later in the year. And, make a bucket list of things we can do over the next year so that another weekend or holiday doesn’t pass us by each day asking each other “what should we do today? I don’t know.” and then spend the whole day in the house at home.
On the friends front, it will be harder, especially considering all the unknowns in the world and difference in comfort levels but, I need to be more intentional about texting and calling friends one on one. Checking in on them. Organizing monthly Zoom calls with different groups and whoever can make it, can make it. And, schedule a couple of days over the summer when we can all meet outside and just get it on everyone’s calendar. If anything, these past couple of years have really shown me the importance of community.
Finding time to relax: Again, this is about scheduling and routine. So, on work days I get up at 6, try to get a quick workout or walk in before getting ready for the day and will begin work around 8:30 after Kyla is off at daycare. And, around 1:00 pm I will turn on some soft jazz music (this is my favourite playlist), put some relaxing oils in the diffuser (my favourites are Hygge, Anchor and a blend of Black Spruce and Grapefruit) and grab myself a cappuccino or tea. This changes the fast-paced vibe to were starting the decent. Keep working but the vibe is different and we’re generally not working quite as fast now. And then around 3:30 pm I run myself a bath. I am NOT typically a bath person but, for that reason I feel okay doing this on a work day because I know I’m not going to waste like 2 hours just laying around. But, essentially, I take my “lunch” at 3:30 and have a 30 minute hot bath. It allows for time to de stress and reflect on the day and with a clear head, come up with a reasonable plan to finish what needs to get done before the day. I am back to work by 4 pm and finish the last hour with a bang.
This routine has been really working for me. It breaks up the monotony of the day as well as, allows for some true “self care” time while I have some space to myself.
I don’t bother doing any of this on the weekends because I do want to spend quality family time together and I mean let’s be transparent, who in their life is going to have a peaceful bath with a toddler running in and out of the washroom? So, why waste the time… I’d rather spend it playing with her anyway.
So, how do I eliminate the stressors?
Anxiety about something happening to myself or family: I practice virtually all of the items I talked about on last weeks post. And, these are continuous practices and not inherent.
Unexpected Finances: Again, this just comes down to planning. So, putting away a little bit each month to allow for those unexpected things And, potentially recording what unexpected expenses popped up last year and allow for them again. If they don’t happen… great!
The virus and everything that comes along with it: I have had to come to terms with the fact that we have limited knowledge of anything to do with it. Even after 2 years. So, we have to be comfortable with the choices we’ve made and choose not to place any judgement on anyone who has made a different choice. I truly believe that the judgement and division that this has created is a virus in and of itself. And, that’s a virus I can choose not to be a part of. So, that’s all that I can do. Make the choice(s) for yourself, be confident in that choice (whatever it may be) and don’t judge anyone else.
Occasional Deadlines: As said above, it just comes down to planning and using a schedule appropriately. I have yet to find the perfect planner so I use a combination of i-cal for personal and family appointments or deadlines, a paper agenda style planner for From Heaven & Hope and a daily to-do list style note pad for my day job. So, far it’s working well.
I love this practice at the beginning of the year but, I do realize time is a relatively new concept. So, you choose when your new year begins. And, if you’re struggling in grief, anxiety or fear, just feel that grief for now. And, when you’ve managed to find your way to a space where you can accept peace or whatever your word is, do your own practice and create a new space where you can live and honor the one you lost well.
