My Gratitude List
As you may know, and maybe you have taken advantage of it, we have a FREE workbook available here at From Heaven and Hope. Just scroll down to the bottom of the page!
And, one of the pieces to that workbook is creating a gratitude list that pulls out the beauty from the pain. And, that’s the key right? Really digging into the pain of what is causing you grief and finding the good that came out of that.
That said though, it can be really difficult to see that good. So, I thought I might share my gratitude list from when we were doing our second IVF transfer. This was after we lost Brady, Levi and had our first miscarriage from our first transfer. So, we were in the thick of grief and also major anxiety as to what our family might look like moving forward.
I did this everyday while we were leading up to and for about a month after the transfer and SPOILER ALERT, this was my pregnancy with Kyla. My only pregnancy to date that resulted in a healthy baby and now child. I don’t know if it was this piece that made it successful but, I can say for certain that I was much more able to cope with the stress of this experience and the unknowns.
So, without further delay, here is my own list from the summer of 2017:
I’m grateful for my relationship with Neil
I’m grateful for my time with Brady
I’m grateful he taught me about urea cycle disorder
I’m grateful for the financial means to pay for IVF
I’m grateful genetic testing is available through IVF
I’m grateful to have known and felt Levi
I’m grateful for supportive friends
I’m grateful for supportive family
I’m grateful for my faith
I’m grateful for an able body to tolerate IVF and pregnancy
I’m grateful for our community support for the golf tournament
I’m grateful for our connections to the children’s hospital
Most of these things are on this list because of my grief not in spite of it. Meaning, if the grief didn’t exist, neither would most of these amazing things. That is not to say that I wouldn’t trade most of these things to have Brady and Levi back with us but, it is very evident that from pain comes beauty.
If I were to do this list now, Kyla would of course, be at the top of the list. And, her existence likely would not be possible if they survived. I wouldn’t trade her for the world! So, there is a beautiful and heartbreaking example of beauty and pain coexisting.
It is possible. Make your list. Find your gratitude!
